“Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you see the world.”
It’s been a busy week. I just got back from the VA Hospital for my weekly “science experiment” which wore me out today. I was actually pretty tired before I got there, and grew even more weary while there. The past week you could sum up by saying it was filled with education and recreation. My friend, Will, and his brother-in-law, Matt, were kind enough to rig up a contraption which now allows me to surf the internet, read the daily newspaper, listen to music and a whole slew of other activities. Will was gracious enough to buy me an iPad and create a neat way for me to use it with almost no assistance. He and Matt set it up for me last weekend and it’s worked out great so far. It also does allow me to get some neck exercises in while using it. I have used it mainly to read The Plain Dealer, particularly the Sports section (in case you are unaware one of the Cavaliers’ players signed with another team. He was pretty good, so it was a big hit to Clevelanders). Learning to use the iPad falls into this past week’s education.
Last Wednesday, I enjoyed some recreation. I was able to head over to the Q arena with Kristy, Kevin and Mike for the James Taylor/Carole King concert. We had an up-close suite courtesy of my “Uncle Al”, which made for an awesome experience. It was a great concert and the crowd was really into it. I met a man that night whose daughter is interning this summer at Metro for the doctor who was my primary physician during my stay there. Small world! After the concert we made a late night run to Wendy’s which was a delicious way to cap off the evening. Again, I want to thank my mother for arranging transportation. On a side note, I am eagerly awaiting the day when my family will have its own vehicle to transport me in. We have begun looking into purchasing a mini-van that we can have modified for personal use.
Some more of the recreation I enjoyed this past week were several visits from new and old friends. One of these new friends, Pat, is a massage therapist that my buddy Dave has arranged to visit me each week for some therapy. Between Pat and Dave I am fortunate to be getting some much needed range of motion and muscle exercise. I also want to thank another new friend, Josh, who has lent me an e-stim machine to use that helps with tone(and hopefully function), that my mom uses on me each night. And thanks to another new buddy, Kevin, for the awesome St. Ignatius football t-shirt he gave me. If you are not from Northeast Ohio, or did not go to St. Ignatius, it is tough to comprehend the infatuation people of all ages have with the school. Let’s just say there is never a lull in the conversation when talking with another Ignatius man.
This past weekend I was treated to some more education – this time it was regarding the website I am getting ready to launch. Margie, from Hart Associates, spent most of Sunday with me reviewing the content and teaching me how to administer the site. Plus, it was the first time we had formally met, so we spent some of the time just talking about a variety of subjects. I am cetainly grateful to all of the folks at Hart Associates for their willingness to help me with this site, and especially thankful that I was able to spend some face time with Margie. The site should be live in a few weeks. At that time I will no longer use CaringBridge. My new website will allow the user to register and receive notifications when new information is posted. Stay tuned!
In closing, someone asked me this past week if I am happy. It was a simple question, yet caused me to pause for some reflection before answering. Yes, I am happy. There are a lot of things in my life to be happy about. There is a lot that I enjoy; a lot I look forward to, and a lot I expect to continue looking forward to. However, I also feel, sad, frustrated, angry, disappointed, scared and confused. It’s perfectly normal to have a wide range of emotions, to have good days and bad days. I experienced all these emotions before the accident, so it should not come as a surprise that I am experiencing them after the accident. I think the biggest difference though is the time factor; before my injury my negative emotions were finite. Adversity would come, but I also knew it soon would go. Now I am faced with constant adversity and an unknown sense of when it will end. It’s an adjustment that I don’t think I’ll ever let go of, rather it’s one I continue to learn to deal with and accept. I have come to realize that acceptance does not mean I have settled. I won’t settle until I get to where I want to be. But on my journey there I still have the right to be happy and enjoy the things life has to offer. In many ways, I enjoy them more now than before. A lot of people have told me my happiness is of concern to them. I appreciate the concern but I share the same hope that my family and friends are happy as well. As today’s quote says, we are all our own window through which we see the world. I hope we all always see happiness in addition to the many other emotions and challenges we all face.
That’s all for now. As always thank you for the prayers and support. Keep em coming.